New Beginnings

The world didn't end on the 21st of May after all. Phew! What a relief!  I set up this blog the day before that auspicious day, but then thought why bother: nobody would be around to read my pearls of wisdom about the End of Days! So, I spent the day with my family: my son Tunde, his wife Zabrina and their new baby, Jalen.  The other two kids, Nikeya (pron: ni-kee-ya Mom! says Tunde for the umpteenth time), who is graduating from high school next month, and 12 year old Jerrell, were doing their own thing, unconcerned that they were about to miss my last hug, had it all gone according to predictions.

Well, it didn't and here we are, a day later, and the world is as it was the day before. Or that's what I thought, but I just read in the Christian Science Monitor that I shouldn't get too complacent. 41 per cent of Americans still believe the world will end soon – maybe as soon as 2050.  No worries, as the Australians say, my 67th birthday is coming up soon, so I would be judged by then anyway.

Back to today – a new beginning – for the world and for me.

For me the new beginning actually started three weeks ago with the birth of my first biological grandson, Jalen Alexander. Yes, of course, he is healthy and gorgeous and a miracle. Have you ever seen an ugly, nasty baby?  Neither have I. Nasty people are bred, not born.

It's a beautiful, sunny day in southern Florida. Sunday. Hardly a cloud in the sky. I am sitting on the back porch, watching the slowly lapping waters of one of the myriads of canals dotting southern Florida. I've been sitting here for hours. A couple of middle aged men passed slowly on their very masculine jet skis - one with a dog in a yellow harness in the back seat. Three teenagers zoomed passed in a noisy motorized canoe, but returned much more quietly.  I guess they spent their energies rushing upstream.

A bucolic day. A day for relaxation and dreaming.

When I was a teenager, I would dream about the future. What would it be like? Would I get married, would I have kids?  When I had Tunde, I wondered what HE would be like and whether I would be a good mother and wife?

To my surprise the question today is of the same ilk: what will Jalen be like and would I be a good grandmother?  What does it mean to be a grandmother? Let alone a good one?  Do I stop being me - an independent single woman living in Australia, engaged in the World, or am I supposed to move my butt over to Florida to be near Jalen and do whatever grandmothers are expected to do?

Don't get me wrong.  Nobody is expecting me to do anything - openly.  But the question hangs with me and Tunde, my friends and me and, between me and me. 'What will you do now?'

What am I supposed to do?!

I am a city girl.  I was born in Budapest, Hungary, grew up in London, UK, lived in Washington DC, USA and now live in the heart of Sydney, Australia, a 20minute bus ride from its iconic Opera House. I don't do suburbia well – even with a car – never did.

So, the purpose of this blog is to discover what being a grandparent is all about. It's a new adventure for me, and I would like to share it with you.